Lovesick Smurfette
by Nigel Yearning
Summary: Smurfette has a crush on the new smurf who had been living in the Smurf Village for 6 months, will she be able to confess her feelings to him? Oneshot.


**Disclaimer: I do not own any characters**

**Claimer: I only own characters that are "NOT" in the Smurfs comic, tv series, and movie.**

On one sunny afternoon at the smurf village, Smurfette stares out an open window from her bedroom with droopy eyes as she rest her head on her arms. She watched a particular smurf who was doing gardening work with a spade. His name was Chernov, he's slightly taller than the average smurf in the village and his skin is bright green due to genetic engineering. He's usually seen in a camouflaged jacket, camouflaged trousers, and black shoes. His Smurf hat is also camouflaged.

Hearts form and pop around Smurfette's head, she has a crush on him ever since he arrived in town a week after his father saved the smurfs from a dam break. All the other smurfs do not know that Smurfette is in love with Chernov but they knew that she's in love and she's not loving them. Too many times have they gave Smurfette flowers and asked her to marry them including Papa Smurf who ends up wishing he is younger. The only smurf who's not interested in her is Chernov, who simply treats her as just another ordinary smurf.

He works at his garden on most days, which results in him competing with Farmer Smurf to produce more food. When he worked on his garden, he does it half naked like revealing a skinny torso and a bit of muscle – something that others smurfs don't have as they were shorter and fatter. His physic and appearance has captured Smurfette's attention and immediately falls in love with him.

Chernov does not noticed her and is not interested, he isn't even interested in any women. His mom died giving birth to him and his dad, who happens to be human, leaves him yet keeps in touch. By growing up without a mother, Chernov see's no value in life whatsoever. He does not see his friends lives as priceless, he does not see his life priceless either.

He provides some entertainment to the village, yet he almost never shows any emotions only just a neutral look on his face. Sometimes he show's he elated, but he doesn't show it very well or never at all. The smurf's never see him in town at all except Brainy who see's him on most days of the week. Smurfette knew she would have to express her feelings to him, to tell him that she loves him – but she thinks it's difficult to do so as what happens next.

Chernov finally finished tending his garden and tosses his spade aside, he turns around and then accidentally steps on a rake. The handle whacked Chernov in his face with such force, he grabbed it for a few seconds before grumbling and picking up the rake... that's when he stepped on another one which it's handle smacked him on the nose.

He wiped his face like he's brushing something off of it quickly and stomps on the ground yelling, "Woo, woo, woo, woo" similar to what Curly Howard on the Three Stooges would do when frustrated. Everyone nearby watched as he takes the two rakes and threw it through his window of his Mushroom House. After storming inside with a nosebleed, the tall factory like chimney that sticks out of his home began to spew out smoke.

No one really knows why he needed a chimney larger than what's needed, but it usually gives off a sweet Spruce smell into the air which helps everyone approve at the sight of it. Smurfette sighs as she closes her bedroom window and sits on a chair to stare at a corner of her bedroom for hours. Then she got up and left her house to maker her move on Chernov. Smurfs nearby began to notice her with hearts hovering by her head and manage to hide and watch the love stricken Smurfette walk across town and approaches Chernov's house.

The window that was broken had fallen out of it's pane and a new one took it's place, glass was still everywhere and there was still blood splattered on the ground. Nosy Smurf hides nearby as he watched Smurfette knocked on Chernov's door, it doesn't take long for him to answer. The hearts disappeared as Chernov answers the door, his nose stopped bleeding and is still half naked just like a regular smurf.

"And there she was, knocking at my door because she has nothing better to do." he said in a nurturing tone with his usual neutral expression, "Come in, I have nothing planned today."

Smurfette walks inside as Chernov closes the door, inside she noticed everything was high tech and there's only three rooms. She didn't realized how small Chernov's house is, she finds the fireplace that was connected to the chimney. It was a miniature furnace with a pit as big and wide as 7 of Jokey's exploding presents, it has a grate on it which prevents whatever is being burned to fall into the fire.

"I used that fireplace to burn my food waste and to help shape metal with," said Chernov, "I added in some Spruce Logs so that it helps make the air smell better and it doesn't stink up the village."

Smurfette's heart race as Chernov sits down at the kitchen table and sets down some bottles filled with clear looking liquid, "You seemed tense, this Vodka would help ease things up a little bit."

"Vodka?" Smurfette finally spoke as she sits down, "What's that?"

"A mixture of Ethanol and Water, I make it myself." said Chernov, "Try some, it may taste bad at first but it will taste good the next. Sweet and Sour Candy for instance."

Chernov slides her a bottle of vodka, and she took a sip. It obviously tasted horrible but then as she drank more it tasted good, she then asked for another bottle. "Go easy on the stuff, it slows down your nervous system." said Chernov.

Outside, smurfs began to gather around Chernov's windows and watched as he closes the airtight lid on his fireplace which would soon kill the fire. One by one, he shuts the blinds on his windows then drape blackout curtains over them preventing the smurfs to see in. After drinking 4 bottles, Smurfette was finally drunk and she tries to get up only to collapsed onto the floor. "Woah, I told you to go easy on that stuff." said Chernov, "Best for you to stay here for the night."

Since alcohol amplifies people's moods, Smurfette loves Chernov even more and with the pressure off she finally begins to speak. "I came here to tell you I love you," she blurted out, "I smurfing love you."

Well that was easy, Chernov looked at her if she's retarded for a second then said. "Yeah, it happens." Chernov takes Smurfette to his bedroom where he lie her on his bed and takes off his pants, shoes, and hat revealing brown hair that's flattened onto his head. Smurfette took off her high heels and stripped to her underwear before crawling underneath the covers with Chernov.

With the lights off inside the home, any smurf that manages to see in is now in the dark. Tracker Smurf manages to pick up the alcohol smell coming from inside the house, but then Papa Smurf came by to disperse the crowd. "Okay you smurfs, leave at once." he ordered.

All the smurfs left back to their homes, Papa Smurf decides to investigate what's going on. He manages to find a small hole throw the wall and looks through to see Smurfette and Chernov in bed together, then Chernov spoke.

"I missed my mom, in fact I never met her." he says to Smurfette, "She died from Cardiac Arrest, it was hard for my dad because he wanted me to grow up with a mother. And when he left me to live with you guys, I sometimes cry myself out in bed on some nights because of my mom."

"What does your mom look like?" asked Smurfette as she stares into the blackness of the room.

"She's a sexy smurfette, or at least what my dad says," said Chernov, "I saw a picture of her and she almost look just like you, can't say anymore."

"Is that why you live with us?" asked Smurfette.

"I'm living life without a cause to live it, but I don't have a straight answer on why I do what I do," said Chernov, "It's in my blood I suppose, my human blood."

"Well, I suggest you start living," said Smurfette as she leans over Chernov and kissed him on the lips.

"Yeah, I suppose I should," said Chernov as he gets right on top of Smurfette and the two started smooching each other.

Papa Smurf watched as their underwear fly off and they "connected", causing him to back away with big eyes. He simply ran home and slept with the lights on that night. When Nosy Smurf look through the same hole, he went straight home awhile dragging his rear on the ground awhile using his hands to push himself along.

When morning arose, Chernov and Smurfette woke up and they got out of bed. "Slept well?" asked Chernov as he puts on his clothes.

"Yes," said Smurfette as she gets dressed.

"You seemed sober enough, you should go home before anyone notices." advised Chernov.

"Yeah, your right I should go," said Smurfette, "Bye."

Smurfette leaves Chernov's house skipping and dancing along, Smurfs who were beginning to wake up saw Smurfette coming through the village path and walked into her home closing the door behind her. Realizing what happened, Papa Smurf came to Chernov's house and knocked on the door. "Yeah?" asked Chernov who was putting on his camouflaged jacket.

"What did Smurfette came to your house for?" he asked, "I'm asking because this has gathered the whole village's attention."

"She came over to confess that she loves me," said Chernov, "Despite me not noticing her, and I know you were peeping through that hole into my bedroom last night."

"Oh, you know that?" asked Papa Smurf.

"I can smell you from a mile away, I can smell anyone from a mile away." said Chernov, "I knew you would be interested just like the other smurfs because you and the others tried to ask her to be married."

"And you do know that as well." said Papa Smurf.

"I'm no expert on women, but after what happened last night I think that no one will asked her out on a date because I've succeeded by simply ignoring her." said Chernov, "She almost looks like my mom though, maybe that's why we woo hooed last night."

Chernov shuts his front door and Papa Smurf walked away, he just wonders if he could do something different. From that point on, no one asked Smurfette to marry them again.


End file.
